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he was one of those dick-faced kids in shades of bright polyester salmon who seemed to always be laughing or looking at me. an ambiguous-named, feminine-famed all-school american douchebag in those quality leather sandals in the wintertime and golf-green shorts.

ta give you some background i'm about as far away on the social scale from him as one can get. you know how all the little groups overlap and flap together, pushed around in the wet sand like wave-rivulets blending little facets of stones together until it makes a dune? well our groups---they didn't even touch. i mean you could go from pop-jock to lacrosse to dipper to weed-dealer to hipster to artsy kid to photographer to theatre kid and MAYBE just MAYBE make a weak little chain like one o em shitty-ass jump rings that connect dollar-store lockets. but anyway the point i'm trying to make is we sit on opposite sides of the room and let sociology take its toll.

of course murphy's law works in that i never know anyone. is it that i'm too far off or too much there? i never know. can't be smart in school i'm a nerd, can't be smart in life i'm a prude. can't be dumb because my specific levels of hotness and craziness are not in the correct implements of measuring. so i do what i do. i draw and i write poems in the margins and generally people leave me well enough alone.

kinda like people can smell it on me, they know i'm a writer and an artist and a vegetarian and like pirahnas they've got this queer ability to sense i like cats and being alone. when we're in groups we all size each other up and decide on our methods of survival and likelihood to find a match and like magic they all search out the eyes under the sweep of hiding-hair. so i doodle some halfass mitosis diagram or a president's head or holden's hat; whatever.

so back to the dick. we were playing this game with drawing i guess so i drew first---a clown. i gave him a big rubber nose and kidney-bean feet and popcorn stitching on his jacket and it was a sad damn excuse even for a clown. a bad excuse, even for a caricature of a person. but dick just looked at me and goes 'wow, that's so much better than i could ever do.' and outside i went aw shucks but inside i breathed i know.

so it continues on like this for weeks. months and no one knows my name. not even mrs. teacher who though i continuously ace her tests calls me sarah. the class is literally just a fishbowl filled with jocks who'd rather be mackin out or texting or sports, even though they're pretty much doing all those already. i sit in a corner and doodle self-righteously. sometimes i spout words about nietzche and marx and they are technically correct (though who even knows how much of history is even correct anymore and how much is a story).

we get a stupid assignment to draw the life cycle of a person. of course mine is fuckin hilarious. filled with dry wit and cynicism on death because what are you supposed to draw? a little sarcasm sprinkled over the truth sucks all the fat away, leaving something that's still true but sounds fake. it makes people feel comfortable in their uncomfortableness, in their awkward skins. i get eleven points out of the ten given and look over to dick, sitting in his khaki beach shorts.

mrs. teacher knows dick's name.

'dick, you should show the class your art.'

i am expecting stick-figures. and maybe that's why we all suck so much and judge so hard---because stick-figures is all that we expect.

'he's such a great artist.'

and things i did not know showed on his paper---careful lines in sharpie and orange and green and purple. not a thing i would have done. something careful and beautiful and unlike the things i have seen.

we never want to find people fleshed out that we already wrote stories for in ink.
resipiscent - ( )
To learn from experience or have one's sanity restored
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Daily Deviation

Given 2012-09-28
resipiscent by ~hipsterfaust suggester writes: Think about assumptions, and how you make them, and why perhaps you shouldn't. ( Suggested by Solarune and Featured by BeccaJS )
:icondalekcaanii:
DalekCaanII Featured By Owner May 29, 2015  Hobbyist Writer
I love this. :heart:
I don't know why everyone's making a fuss about the grammar. I think it gives you, like, perspective or something artistic like that.
(I know it's been three years, but I like this & I wanna say I like it, so there xD)

Anyways, congratulations on the Daily Deviation! <3
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:iconbeccajs:
BeccaJS Featured By Owner Sep 29, 2012   Writer
I've replied to a few comments here about the grammar, but honestly the reason I featured this was because the way the grammar is placed effects the way the piece is written. If it was written more formal and "correct" it wouldn't bear the same effect or impact it has done. There's probably the odd bit that needs a tweak here and there, but please don't go capitalising things etc- it will kill the impact!
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:iconhipsterfaust:
hipsterfaust Featured By Owner Sep 29, 2012  Student Writer
(: awww, thank you! and thank you for helping make this a DD. (:
Reply
:iconfervvent:
fervvent Featured By Owner Sep 28, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
i saw your journal on this, and i read a few of the comments just to see what people were saying - i really don't think there are major issues with the grammar, and definitely not any that are enough to comment about it! the grammar isn't the point; the story & the characters & the meaning is much more important. i've loved this since you posted it a long time ago and it definitely deserves the DD! :heart:
Reply
:iconhipsterfaust:
hipsterfaust Featured By Owner Sep 28, 2012  Student Writer
awww, thank you! i was troubled about the grammar stuff; if anything, it's for style purposes. thank you so much for continuing to read and comment on my writing; you're one of my oldest followers and it means a lot to me. (:
Reply
:iconfervvent:
fervvent Featured By Owner Sep 28, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
you're welcome (: yeahh i agree about the
style thing, especially when something is
written in first person since the character
might just tell the story/speak that way.
& i'm glad (:
Reply
:iconphiibuscus:
Phiibuscus Featured By Owner Sep 28, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
I didn't really notice the grammar, it needs a lot of capitalization work though. Otherwise this is such an amazingly written story. I love the figures of speech the most. I am a young poet myself, and I don't know why I am typing my sentences so neatly. I think I got carried away with the grammar of the story and decided to talk very proper in my comment... anyways, your figurative language is great!! Keep it up!
Reply
:iconhipsterfaust:
hipsterfaust Featured By Owner Sep 28, 2012  Student Writer
hahaha, thanks! i, too, can talk very properly when i want to. i don't often capitalise on dA; just a style choice! i can capitalise, though. but thank you for reading! (:
Reply
:iconphiibuscus:
Phiibuscus Featured By Owner Sep 28, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Oh ok it was a good style choice for a hipster I must say, not mainstream, perfect for a hipster. Way too man people got mad though, that once happened to me when I said sisfist to a girl on a pewdiepie video. I got about 100 replies, most saying it sounded really dumb and I should shut up. It was so dumb, but your post was a very awesome one so I think we should give you props for that and not go all grammar teacher on you xD
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:iconhipsterfaust:
hipsterfaust Featured By Owner Sep 28, 2012  Student Writer
(: hahaha thanks! i honestly just like the way lowercase looks as opposed to uppercase. and aw man if too many people are doin' the lowercase thing MAYBE I SHOULD GO BACK TO NORMAL CAPS hahaha (:
Reply
:iconcaptainmcclellan:
CaptainMcClellan Featured By Owner Sep 28, 2012
You leave a bad taste in my mouth, and they say your grammar is atrocious (in truth not so bad), but the point is: you learned a lesson. You improved. There then is something you have beaten me. Also your cynicism is something to behold, let's have a contest of dark grey matter. That'll be fun, if you so choose to accept. If not, there's always just conversing. As per Marx, do you perhaps refer to the Erwin Otto Marx? :3 Sorry I don't take stock in the philosophers and the psychologists, rather the mechanics, and the innovators are the ones that I know. Still, I should, shouldn't I? If nothing else than a repertoire of witty quotes. Please, do you also dabble in the musical arts? Please say you do... That would be a worthy discussion. :) Mussorgsky, have you heard of?
Reply
:iconhipsterfaust:
hipsterfaust Featured By Owner Sep 28, 2012  Student Writer
hello! i'm sorry about the bad taste grammar thing (bad taste? why?)...i always thought my grammar was good, i'm kinda confused at this point. but thanks for sticking it out! marx was supposed to be like karl marx; just a name i remember hearing a lot of in history class. i'm not sure i can measure up to your witty puns and such, and i have not heard of mussorgsky. but thank you for reading!
Reply
:iconcaptainmcclellan:
CaptainMcClellan Featured By Owner Sep 28, 2012
Yeah, the grammar's not such a big thing. (Because... your feminine spite, and parts of your style that are similar to mine, but different enough to sorta... like "feedback" I guess. You know how when you put two similar, but slightly different notes that clash together? Well they do just that: clash. Besides your repetition of "dick" is a bit... unnecessary. I don't go around referring to females as "pussies". Remember, good manners are important. And I know that was kinda the point, misreading people because you don't give them the chance. And I will try not to do the same thing. ) And I said "that's what others said", whereas I thought it was pretty good. And, then haha, no. You can't just spout of names without knowing who they are. And you never know until you try squaring off. :) As per Mussorgsky, that's too bad. He's really, really good! Here, listen: [link] You're welcome. It caught my eye, that in itself is pretty good! And then it was even better than at first glance.
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:iconhipsterfaust:
hipsterfaust Featured By Owner Sep 28, 2012  Student Writer
don't worry: i know who marx is. i read the communist manifesto! (: i agree with you about repeating 'dick' a lot...i could have cut back /:
Reply
:iconcaptainmcclellan:
CaptainMcClellan Featured By Owner Sep 29, 2012
What does Communism have to do with high-voltage? :XD: And yes, yes you could've.
Reply
:iconhorrorgirl135:
Horrorgirl135 Featured By Owner Sep 28, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
At first I almost skipped it because the grammar is horrible. Personally it's a big pet peeve of mine when writing a story. BUT I'm glad I did keep reading, very interesting. I love how you brought it on a more personal level with the reader.
Reply
:iconbeccajs:
BeccaJS Featured By Owner Sep 29, 2012   Writer
There is a real, fine fine line between bad grammar and something written deliberately in a way to address the character and style of the piece. This piece is a good example of that- if it was written any other way I don't think it would have the same effect.
Reply
:iconhorrorgirl135:
Horrorgirl135 Featured By Owner Sep 29, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
I know I stated that. I suppose the grammar isn't to bad but it's the capitalization. It's a writers' choice, not one I'd choose, but a choice all the same.
Reply
:iconhipsterfaust:
hipsterfaust Featured By Owner Sep 28, 2012  Student Writer
aww...is it really that bad? :( i did not sense this upon writing, i try to write as i would think or speak...anyway, thank you for continuing! (:
Reply
:iconhorrorgirl135:
Horrorgirl135 Featured By Owner Sep 28, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Well the grammar is bad BUT I think you put a purpose to it, which makes it good in a sense. I applaud your work! You are very talented , keep writing, I think you can be a great writer. :)
Reply
:iconhipsterfaust:
hipsterfaust Featured By Owner Sep 28, 2012  Student Writer
thanks! as for the grammar, i'm gonna agree to disagree on this one (:
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:iconhorrorgirl135:
Horrorgirl135 Featured By Owner Sep 28, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Well, let me rephrase then. :) Your grammar isn't to bad just capitalization is. I understand it is a writers' choice, not mine, but whatever floats your boat. :D
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:iconhipsterfaust:
hipsterfaust Featured By Owner Sep 28, 2012  Student Writer
(: excellent. thanks! i probably should capitalise; i realise the whole 'all lowercase' thing is kinda juvenile. but i like it. (:
Reply
:iconsuzannemoseley:
SuzanneMoseley Featured By Owner Sep 28, 2012
I loved the journey and was really struck with the finale. You are amazing.
Reply
:iconhipsterfaust:
hipsterfaust Featured By Owner Sep 28, 2012  Student Writer
thank you so much! (: i am glad. YOU are amazing. (:
Reply
:iconwonderingwriter:
WonderingWriter Featured By Owner Sep 28, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Astounding and resounding. You have tight leash on the English language, successfully leading it down your intend path. The imagery is provocative, staring down the reader while daring the to contradict the narrator.
Reply
:iconhipsterfaust:
hipsterfaust Featured By Owner Sep 28, 2012  Student Writer
thank you! this comment is amazing. (: thanks for taking the time to read!
Reply
:icontechnoparade:
technoparade Featured By Owner Sep 28, 2012   Digital Artist
this is beautiful and I cried omg
Reply
:iconhipsterfaust:
hipsterfaust Featured By Owner Sep 28, 2012  Student Writer
thank you...that touches me. i never intended for this piece to be this big, but hearing responses like this makes my day. makes writing worth it! (:
Reply
:iconcaptainmcclellan:
CaptainMcClellan Featured By Owner Sep 28, 2012
Not beautiful, so much as effective.
Reply
:iconmiyori999:
Miyori999 Featured By Owner Sep 28, 2012   General Artist
At first, the horrible grammar threw me off - particularly the lack of capitalization. I rolled my eyes when I read, "i'm a writer," wondering how this could have ever gotten a DD.

Then I finished reading and realized the parallels between what one thinks of themselves and what one thinks of others. The narrator thinks themselves a writer and artist, while the boy doesn't think of himself as an artist, yet he seems to be the one with the talent. The unreasonably confident, versus the unreasonably humble. The point made by assuming things about others is clearly made, even with the creation of an unsympathetic character.
Reply
:iconbeccajs:
BeccaJS Featured By Owner Sep 29, 2012   Writer
There is a real, fine fine line between bad grammar and something written deliberately in a way to address the character and style of the piece. This piece is a good example of that- if it was written any other way I don't think it would have the same effect.
Reply
:iconhipsterfaust:
hipsterfaust Featured By Owner Sep 28, 2012  Student Writer
hmm, i really didn't think the grammar was that bad. although, sorry about the lack of capitalisation---it's just i would rather type fast and not capitalise than not get all my ideas down. i bet the 's' instead of 'z's also pisses you off a bit. ah, well---just the way i learnt---picked it up from others.

thank you for your insight into the story! the themes and morals people are coming up with for it are just amazing. that is not a theme i would have intended, yet i see how it can be true.
Reply
:iconcaptainmcclellan:
CaptainMcClellan Featured By Owner Sep 28, 2012
Content over medium and practice. Still... It would not have helped.
Reply
:iconcaptainmcclellan:
CaptainMcClellan Featured By Owner Sep 28, 2012
I meant would have. *Shame*
Reply
:iconhipsterfaust:
hipsterfaust Featured By Owner Sep 28, 2012  Student Writer
i don't understand what grammar is bad in it; can you provide an example? if it's the capitalisation thing, it is a choice! sorry! it's just more appealing to me to write that way. (:
Reply
:iconcaptainmcclellan:
CaptainMcClellan Featured By Owner Sep 29, 2012
"Ta give you" would be bad grammar, even though it's colloquialism and therefor acceptable. And there are many other punctuation problems I don't even feel like finding. I just keep reading, because it's the message that matters, not the execution. Besides Twain was really, really bad with grammar. (At least in the spoken lines, but it was intentional, and fitting. Again, accounting for style your grammar was not that bad. Besides, I rarely get punctuation perfect either. )
Reply
:iconlizziecat1279:
lizziecat1279 Featured By Owner Sep 28, 2012  Student General Artist
Fascinating. The ending is just...absolutely intriguing. The most interesting part honestly is that it's non-fiction...which means it really happened to you didn't it?
I love how people can surprise you, even though I myself am guilty of making assumptions. But of course, I have to remind myself that when you assume it just makes an "ass" out of "u" and "me". No idea who said that, but it works heh.

Congrats on the DD! :D
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:iconhipsterfaust:
hipsterfaust Featured By Owner Sep 28, 2012  Student Writer
yes, this did happen to me. which is sad, because a lot of the comments on this tend to find the narrator, my character, a harsh-ass untalented bitch of some kind. (: however, i'm glad you picked up on the theme. people CAN surprise you. what happened to me, and why i chose to write about it; this simple moment really impacted me. a real life fairy-tale with a moral.

thank you! (:
Reply
:iconlizziecat1279:
lizziecat1279 Featured By Owner Sep 28, 2012  Student General Artist
You're very welcome.

Honestly, the way you write it makes it feel like you're painting that sort of picture, at least in this piece. It doesn't matter what kind of person you really are or not.
OH I have the perfect example of this! There's a piece you faved about carnivore stuff, and when you figure it out it's a poem about birth. But it's written to make the baby seem demonic. Doesn't matter how innocent the resulting baby is, but ya.
The point of it should not be focused on the character of yourself, rather, the whole "people can surprise you" bit. As you very well know x3
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:iconhipsterfaust:
hipsterfaust Featured By Owner Sep 28, 2012  Student Writer
yeah man! that is a good example. (: thank you!
Reply
:iconlizziecat1279:
lizziecat1279 Featured By Owner Sep 28, 2012  Student General Artist
You're very welcome <3
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:iconlaffinia:
laffinia Featured By Owner Sep 28, 2012
beautiful.
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:iconhipsterfaust:
hipsterfaust Featured By Owner Sep 28, 2012  Student Writer
<3
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:iconneurotype:
neurotype Featured By Owner Sep 28, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
I didn't have high expectations for the narrator, I'm glad the end lines allowed for a reevaluation.

To be fair, that probably makes me as bad as the narrator myself. Well played.

I kind of wish 'dick' were capitalized when the teacher calls him up, I thought that was just the narrator substituting her bias in until I read the comments.
Reply
:iconhipsterfaust:
hipsterfaust Featured By Owner Sep 28, 2012  Student Writer
i am glad you re-evaluated. the narrator is me, a person who tends to think she does not judge. but it turns out i do, just like everyone does. thus the story!

thanks for picking up on that! i wanted something of that sort to happen.

the 'dick' thing was meant to go either way; as a name, or as her evaluation of him.

thank you for reading!
Reply
:iconneurotype:
neurotype Featured By Owner Sep 28, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Haha, happens to everyone at some point, doesn't it?

ooh. Works perfectly, then.

Sure!
Reply
:icondweckie:
dweckie Featured By Owner Sep 28, 2012  Student Writer
A touching, relatable read. I love it (: ♥
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:iconhipsterfaust:
hipsterfaust Featured By Owner Sep 28, 2012  Student Writer
thank you! <3
Reply
:iconj-ko:
J-ko Featured By Owner Sep 28, 2012
I like how the writing style throws a person off, and I had the first impression that the narrator was dumb, it's like how we judge the narrator like how the narrator's judging Dick and then as we find out Dick isn't all he seems the narrator also isn't as stupid as she(?) sounded in the beginning.

Congrats on the DD, and thanks for the quick read!
Reply
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